Updated: Feb 22
Disclaimer: Some of the things I share with you might not work for you. These are things that work for me. I encourage you to try new things in order to get better and get the help you need. We are in this together and you are not alone.
In my previous blog, I shared my story of how I suffered from prenatal depression in the Pandemic (you can read it here) The first thing I had to do in order to get better was admit that I was depressed. Even though deep down I didn’t want to admit it. I had to accept it, become aware of it, and then acknowledge it. Here is the video version of this blog on my @HealinSpace Instagram page.
In my last three months of pregnancy, I spoke to a therapist. I was not sure if it was going to help because I don’t like sharing my problems with a stranger, but when we met each week, I was sharing and talking more than I thought. It actually helped me become aware of what was going on with me and where all these feelings were coming from. This led me to speak with a Chrisitan advisor, who prayed with me and helped me stay focused on the Word of God. My advisor, share scriptures and devotional with me. To remember that God loves me and help through such a hard time
Look into therapy, yes therapy is expensive. However, Check your insurance company to see if they will cover it. If not look into local social workers in your community. Sometimes they can also help you as well. Local libraries provide great resources for the community.
Therapy for Black women and Pre/Postnatal Depression
Mothers Support Group:
Once I start seeking therapy, I was referred over to this great organization called the Postpartum Resource Center Of NY which had a mother’s Support group. I joined the mothers’ group and found it so helpful to hear about other mothers who were experiencing similar feelings I felt. It really felt so good to hear another mother tell her story and what she did to get better.
If you are in NY here is information from the Postpartum Resources Center Of NY If https://postpartumny.org/you do not live in NY there is a directory on the postpartum resource center website that will search your area. Here the link https://postpartumny.org/resourcedirectory/
Other Resources: https://pprc.support/https://postpartumny.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/prcny-resourcedirectory-january-2021.pdf. Check your hospital/ birthing center that you've been giving birth at and see if they have a program for expecting mothers. Speak with your doctor or midwife regarding this.
I wrote everything down because I always felt my mind was full of so many thoughts. I wrote down my prayers and deepest feelings on paper. Once I became pregnant it was hard to write about how I was feeling. So my support group suggests that we journal what we are grateful for. This helped because it got me off all the negative things that were happening and it stopped me from thinking about what I didn't have or where I should be ect. It helped to focus on the moment and the presence of time.
Make a gratitude list, but be very specific about what you’re grateful for. For example, my son was in the NICU for 14 days. I was grateful that my son was getting better every day. I was grateful that he was breathing on his own, I was grateful for the nurses that took care of him. I was grateful that his blood transfusion went well. Be very specific about what you are grateful for. Since we have a life there is always something to be grateful for. It could be anything like, the nice lady at the coffee shop, or the comfort of our pet. It doesn't have to be a certain way and you can repeat the same gratitude list over. That's okay. here a 21-day Journal that I did and I really enjoy it. It's from Minister La'Tanyha Boyd